It's always refreshing to hear a piece that isn't cluttered with sound effects and adjectives. Overachiever was simple, a monologue about the inner thoughts of an overachiever and what is at the end of this burning passion to work hard. Simple. A bit too simple. The piece definitely had the potential to be great. With other voices, Erin could have created complexity to the piece, showing the type of person she wasn't and why. Maybe interviewing her own parents and having them describe her overachieving tendencies. What kind of extraordinary person does she want to be? Why? Character development is so crucial in a piece of self-reflection. What I got out of this piece was the tip of Ernest Hemingway's iceberg. I know there's more to this piece somewhere.
I think the piece is good. The only thing I could recomend is to make the intro a little more interestig as well as an outro. The narrator's voice is good and the fact that is Erin telling the story just makes it more real.
Comments for Overachiever
Produced by Youth Radio and Erin Bilir
Other pieces by Youth Radio
Rating Summary
3 comments
Sandra Chen
Posted on August 22, 2009 at 03:14 PM | Permalink
YEB review of Overachiever
It's always refreshing to hear a piece that isn't cluttered with sound effects and adjectives. Overachiever was simple, a monologue about the inner thoughts of an overachiever and what is at the end of this burning passion to work hard. Simple. A bit too simple. The piece definitely had the potential to be great. With other voices, Erin could have created complexity to the piece, showing the type of person she wasn't and why. Maybe interviewing her own parents and having them describe her overachieving tendencies. What kind of extraordinary person does she want to be? Why? Character development is so crucial in a piece of self-reflection. What I got out of this piece was the tip of Ernest Hemingway's iceberg. I know there's more to this piece somewhere.
Fernanda Sanchez
Posted on July 25, 2009 at 05:11 PM | Permalink
Overachiever
I think the piece is good. The only thing I could recomend is to make the intro a little more interestig as well as an outro. The narrator's voice is good and the fact that is Erin telling the story just makes it more real.
Christopher Moyer
Posted on July 15, 2009 at 11:25 PM | Permalink
Good work.
This is a nice short piece. Your delivery is especially good. Well done.
-CM